I do NOT want to get up
I wanna sit here...in my sorrow
I do NOT, I WILL NOT hope
That things will be better tomorrow
I will not
.....do you HEar me!?!
..............HOPE
Oh, look, she doesn't have a coat
It's freezing outside and I am warm
I don't need this little jacket
I believe this will cover her tiny form
He's hungry, isn't he?
I've bought him food before
Again? even when he's writing his sign
He won't care that he's fed as he walks out that door
I swear if she says one more thing
About how I'm livin' my life
Fine, Jesus, I'll hold my peace
To keep free from stirring up strife
Look at him, he just hurt that child
Look at his heart...break
Daddy, don't you know you value him
With every inconsistency you take
Let me SPEAK, Jesus!
You made me a poet, yet demand I keep silent
Even worse, I can't judge evil
When it is clearly demonstrated in the violent
words and deeds....of others
My LORD, help me, for lacking the compassion
...............a loving mother
Isn't the point of being a mother
The unconditional love she pours into another
You have my heart
I'm sorry for my constant pull
Against everything
You want to rule
.....over
I know and accept your covering
I submit when you pull me to rest
But passion inflames my soul
The moment I lay my head upon your breast
....where I find nourishment for the famished
............and you pour me out as drink offering
Though I hate the constant struggle
I would not want to be anything other than a loving mother
Written by Trudy Schrader on 12-27-2018
Thursday, December 27, 2018
Tuesday, December 25, 2018
WEIGHING WORTHY
When you saw that I had words
That were worthy of weight
You decided I was special
With access to the City's gate
When you saw that I survived
Great suffering and pain
You decided to get from me
Whatever you could gain
When you saw that I learned fast
Anything put before my heart
You decided I was the beginning
Of a fresh, from the throne, start
....to your throne
When you saw that doors opened
Outward to my vision
You decided that my God
Could also be YOUR provision
When you saw that I walked in grace
Among the wicked and vile
You decided I had the "stuff"
To help get you through your trials
When you saw that blessings poured
On and around me, from the heavens
You decided that you would get more
If you provided the leaven
...for your kingdom
Oh, but the moment, I looked like failure
And all the blessings were crushed to ashes
You withdrew yourself from the presence
Of my LOVE's necessary lashes
You quickly joined the throng around my tree
And provided the nails that bound me
....to death
I have no comparison for the agony of destruction
And the ripping of the soul from rejection
All are reduced to a mirror in my hand
So that my accusers will experience the power of deflection
This is the problem with worthy
When it lies in the hands of humanity
The height, depth, and breadth of LOVE
Will always be reduced by intelligence to insanity
I admit it!
LOVE has me
I am held captive...in my WILL
I WILL die for LOVE, with LOVE, and in LOVE, with my LOVE, no matter
...............the cost
Only a fool plunges in without weighing
The cost of treasure he wishes to possess
I am a fool above all fools
Because I found that nothing is more pricey than HIS REST
Written by Trudy Schrader on 12-25-2018
That were worthy of weight
You decided I was special
With access to the City's gate
When you saw that I survived
Great suffering and pain
You decided to get from me
Whatever you could gain
When you saw that I learned fast
Anything put before my heart
You decided I was the beginning
Of a fresh, from the throne, start
....to your throne
When you saw that doors opened
Outward to my vision
You decided that my God
Could also be YOUR provision
When you saw that I walked in grace
Among the wicked and vile
You decided I had the "stuff"
To help get you through your trials
When you saw that blessings poured
On and around me, from the heavens
You decided that you would get more
If you provided the leaven
...for your kingdom
Oh, but the moment, I looked like failure
And all the blessings were crushed to ashes
You withdrew yourself from the presence
Of my LOVE's necessary lashes
You quickly joined the throng around my tree
And provided the nails that bound me
....to death
I have no comparison for the agony of destruction
And the ripping of the soul from rejection
All are reduced to a mirror in my hand
So that my accusers will experience the power of deflection
This is the problem with worthy
When it lies in the hands of humanity
The height, depth, and breadth of LOVE
Will always be reduced by intelligence to insanity
I admit it!
LOVE has me
I am held captive...in my WILL
I WILL die for LOVE, with LOVE, and in LOVE, with my LOVE, no matter
...............the cost
Only a fool plunges in without weighing
The cost of treasure he wishes to possess
I am a fool above all fools
Because I found that nothing is more pricey than HIS REST
Written by Trudy Schrader on 12-25-2018
Monday, December 24, 2018
THE GLIMPSE
Introductions are too timely
I haven't time for quaint talk
Just be who you are
I will watch your walk
Did you see her
She's been in, back to her old ways
Your gift of mercy
Did nothing for how the system preys
It's just the way he is
His mouth is loose and tough
Don't be lookin' for kindness
From one who believes he is more than enough
Searching for outcomes
Have left me bankrupt in reason
But for me to withhold good from another
Is a blatant disregard, and treason
.....against LOVE
Hmmm, well that's interesting
I just saw something, a glimpse
Hard, cold relating isn't welcome
Under the canopy of LOVE's tent
That's it....that's all they know
Pow! Strike! Bang! AND STOP BEING YOU
No wonder their words are venom
And their actions are old, recognizable patterns, in shades of black and blue
How can I be soft
When the frostbite has taken away feeling
And armed soldiers stand guard
Around the last hope of life revealing
LOVE's true nature
Ahhh....yes, patience is the key to the Kingdom
...............and so, I wait.......
..........................for another glimpse.
Written by Trudy on 12-24-2018
I haven't time for quaint talk
Just be who you are
I will watch your walk
Did you see her
She's been in, back to her old ways
Your gift of mercy
Did nothing for how the system preys
It's just the way he is
His mouth is loose and tough
Don't be lookin' for kindness
From one who believes he is more than enough
Searching for outcomes
Have left me bankrupt in reason
But for me to withhold good from another
Is a blatant disregard, and treason
.....against LOVE
Hmmm, well that's interesting
I just saw something, a glimpse
Hard, cold relating isn't welcome
Under the canopy of LOVE's tent
That's it....that's all they know
Pow! Strike! Bang! AND STOP BEING YOU
No wonder their words are venom
And their actions are old, recognizable patterns, in shades of black and blue
How can I be soft
When the frostbite has taken away feeling
And armed soldiers stand guard
Around the last hope of life revealing
LOVE's true nature
Ahhh....yes, patience is the key to the Kingdom
...............and so, I wait.......
..........................for another glimpse.
Written by Trudy on 12-24-2018
Saturday, November 24, 2018
NAMING NAKED
"I come to the gar~den...alone...
While the dew is still...on the...roses.."
...did that rose just move???
"And the voice I hear...
.....WHAT was that???
~gulp~
"Whose there?
Now I know you're there
I don't easily scare
Jesus is here...well...at least he's near"
Listen to yourself, girl
You are crazy, here in your secret place
Where nothing or no one can be
It's your uniquely designed, secluded space
Where was I?
Now I'm not in the mood
There's the gate, my reliant escape
Out of my truth, into his grace
Why won't the gate open
I can't get out...let me out
Finally, a voice speaks
And stills the fear, threatening to...what!?!
He said, "Peace little one
I have you now, in the grain of your cross
Your fear is great as I behold your naked soul
You believe I can give you any gift, but never make you whole
You believe I will provide, but never keep you safe
You believe you are trapped inside your very own gate
What is your truth, my love
What is your consuming fear"
My mind searched deep and wide
As I trembled in LOVE's presence
It floated up and out
"You are nothing more of less, than nature's peasant"
"Ah, yes...you have no value, unlovable to the core
Yet here your LOVE stands, desiring to know you more"
He drew near to me and whispered,
"May I enter into your scars
You will have to trust LOVE
To understand who and where you are."
Although I agreed, the fight was fierce
It took years for HIM to strip me bare
But nothing could prepare me for the rage
When HE entered ....THERE
Like a howl in the darkest night
My soul uttered out a thick, black cry
The deliverance of the wicked
That part of grief that had to die
.....lain upon the wooden altar
While I smelled burning flesh
And heard the popping of the fire
He grew brighter and lovelier
As I allowed the Cross to receive my desire
.....I am naked before HIM, and unashamed
...........my naked has been named
........................FORGIVEN
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-24-2018
While the dew is still...on the...roses.."
...did that rose just move???
"And the voice I hear...
.....WHAT was that???
~gulp~
"Whose there?
Now I know you're there
I don't easily scare
Jesus is here...well...at least he's near"
Listen to yourself, girl
You are crazy, here in your secret place
Where nothing or no one can be
It's your uniquely designed, secluded space
Where was I?
Now I'm not in the mood
There's the gate, my reliant escape
Out of my truth, into his grace
Why won't the gate open
I can't get out...let me out
Finally, a voice speaks
And stills the fear, threatening to...what!?!
He said, "Peace little one
I have you now, in the grain of your cross
Your fear is great as I behold your naked soul
You believe I can give you any gift, but never make you whole
You believe I will provide, but never keep you safe
You believe you are trapped inside your very own gate
What is your truth, my love
What is your consuming fear"
My mind searched deep and wide
As I trembled in LOVE's presence
It floated up and out
"You are nothing more of less, than nature's peasant"
"Ah, yes...you have no value, unlovable to the core
Yet here your LOVE stands, desiring to know you more"
He drew near to me and whispered,
"May I enter into your scars
You will have to trust LOVE
To understand who and where you are."
Although I agreed, the fight was fierce
It took years for HIM to strip me bare
But nothing could prepare me for the rage
When HE entered ....THERE
Like a howl in the darkest night
My soul uttered out a thick, black cry
The deliverance of the wicked
That part of grief that had to die
.....lain upon the wooden altar
While I smelled burning flesh
And heard the popping of the fire
He grew brighter and lovelier
As I allowed the Cross to receive my desire
.....I am naked before HIM, and unashamed
...........my naked has been named
........................FORGIVEN
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-24-2018
Sunday, November 18, 2018
LOVE'S OUTCASTS
He knew who he was,and what he was
He was aware of his sins more than most
But this man can heal, they said
So he humbled himself, and left his post
....for a moment with LOVE
She knew the laws concerning women
Her blood flowed daily for twelve years
If they saw her, she would die
But hope compelled her to silence her fears
....and reach for LOVE's garment
She heard her daughter in the wee hours
Cry out in torment, from voices in her head
She knew that she was not a member of the house
But she would try, even if He said...
.....NO!
He said, it's not good to give the children's food to dogs
Demons are pressing my daughter
I must press in, past all pain and sorrow
I may be a gentile
But LOVE might make me His daughter
....yes, but even the dogs eat the crumbs from under the children's table
Humility moved LOVE to compassion
Humility took LOVE to a woman at a well
Where Love saw her rise and fail
Five husbands, and dingy veil
Only LOVE can bridge the gaps
Between rank, position, and purpose
When life fails humanity and we can't see
That LOVE is proof that our God has heard us
....and given us assurance that there are NO outcasts in the Kingdom of LOVE.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-18-2018
He was aware of his sins more than most
But this man can heal, they said
So he humbled himself, and left his post
....for a moment with LOVE
She knew the laws concerning women
Her blood flowed daily for twelve years
If they saw her, she would die
But hope compelled her to silence her fears
....and reach for LOVE's garment
She heard her daughter in the wee hours
Cry out in torment, from voices in her head
She knew that she was not a member of the house
But she would try, even if He said...
.....NO!
He said, it's not good to give the children's food to dogs
Demons are pressing my daughter
I must press in, past all pain and sorrow
I may be a gentile
But LOVE might make me His daughter
....yes, but even the dogs eat the crumbs from under the children's table
Humility moved LOVE to compassion
Humility took LOVE to a woman at a well
Where Love saw her rise and fail
Five husbands, and dingy veil
Only LOVE can bridge the gaps
Between rank, position, and purpose
When life fails humanity and we can't see
That LOVE is proof that our God has heard us
....and given us assurance that there are NO outcasts in the Kingdom of LOVE.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-18-2018
Wednesday, November 14, 2018
WHEAT WISDOM
Once there was a seed of wheat
Given to righteous owner
Who entrusted it to His servants
On a time-limited loaner
One took the wheat in hand
And let it fall upon the hardened land
Sorrow and grief lined his path
Committed to never giving to others what he lacked
Yet another took the seed in a bag
To his designer garden bed
He sprinkled it, with great joy,
On the perfect, plastic, place where rootless fruit remains dead
The third eyed the owner with disgust
As he kicked hard at land of dust
No place on earth could invite
The seed among thorns, offering beauty with a bite
Last but not least, received the wheat
And blessed it with words of love
Taking care to plant, water, and weed
The garden granted by God above
When the harvest time came
And the owner gathered His servants to give account
The grateful owner had a harvest to share
While the others accused the owner of giving them a lesser amount
....while they remained blameless
The owner declared "Away from me
You liars and thieves, taking only to receive
Never attempting to ground your seed
In the faith of what you believe
You chose to give your seed to the enemy
Fear and failure was easier to keep
Than to be accountable to the owner
From whom you willingly received
You have no wheat because you let the seed die
No one is to blame but your father, who lies
Harvest time has come and empty is your lot
Full of stuff your faith in fear has bought"
No matter the ground the wheat lies upon
The seed will never be a tare
But the stewardship of the seed
Will expose the level of care
......while opportunities remain open
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-14-2018
Given to righteous owner
Who entrusted it to His servants
On a time-limited loaner
One took the wheat in hand
And let it fall upon the hardened land
Sorrow and grief lined his path
Committed to never giving to others what he lacked
Yet another took the seed in a bag
To his designer garden bed
He sprinkled it, with great joy,
On the perfect, plastic, place where rootless fruit remains dead
The third eyed the owner with disgust
As he kicked hard at land of dust
No place on earth could invite
The seed among thorns, offering beauty with a bite
Last but not least, received the wheat
And blessed it with words of love
Taking care to plant, water, and weed
The garden granted by God above
When the harvest time came
And the owner gathered His servants to give account
The grateful owner had a harvest to share
While the others accused the owner of giving them a lesser amount
....while they remained blameless
The owner declared "Away from me
You liars and thieves, taking only to receive
Never attempting to ground your seed
In the faith of what you believe
You chose to give your seed to the enemy
Fear and failure was easier to keep
Than to be accountable to the owner
From whom you willingly received
You have no wheat because you let the seed die
No one is to blame but your father, who lies
Harvest time has come and empty is your lot
Full of stuff your faith in fear has bought"
No matter the ground the wheat lies upon
The seed will never be a tare
But the stewardship of the seed
Will expose the level of care
......while opportunities remain open
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-14-2018
Tuesday, November 6, 2018
DEALING WITH DISTRACTION
Walking or wading in water
Along life's way
I could sense a pull toward
Something...no someone
The life-laden leaves
Drew out breath from my being
I grew greater in the moment
If not for the pleasure of knowing
.....who or what I would be seeing
The birds of the air gathered
In a location, around the noun
Light gathered at a spot and shone
As if there were no sky or ground
Closer and closer I come to the moment
Revelation would soon be mine
I would know and be known
By something or someone above humanity
....divine
I heard movement and looked left
I saw Him, if only for a glance
I knew Him, and He knew me
But someone smeared my screen
............I awoke without a second chance
To possess the image
Was that what I was pushing for
To own experience, unique to me
Was I placing my identity in the natural
Trying to prove value on what others see
......coming through my creativity???
Stupid distractions with magnetic attractions
Pulling and fooling the bird in flight
I don't want to be grounded in order be founded
In the legality of level-headed laws...that bite
.......and eat the heart of man
LOVE is all I want
........all circumstantial evidence is distraction
The End
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-6-2018
Along life's way
I could sense a pull toward
Something...no someone
The life-laden leaves
Drew out breath from my being
I grew greater in the moment
If not for the pleasure of knowing
.....who or what I would be seeing
The birds of the air gathered
In a location, around the noun
Light gathered at a spot and shone
As if there were no sky or ground
Closer and closer I come to the moment
Revelation would soon be mine
I would know and be known
By something or someone above humanity
....divine
I heard movement and looked left
I saw Him, if only for a glance
I knew Him, and He knew me
But someone smeared my screen
............I awoke without a second chance
To possess the image
Was that what I was pushing for
To own experience, unique to me
Was I placing my identity in the natural
Trying to prove value on what others see
......coming through my creativity???
Stupid distractions with magnetic attractions
Pulling and fooling the bird in flight
I don't want to be grounded in order be founded
In the legality of level-headed laws...that bite
.......and eat the heart of man
LOVE is all I want
........all circumstantial evidence is distraction
The End
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-6-2018
Sunday, October 28, 2018
BELIEF'S BABBLING BROOK
Shall I tell of love's journey
And how disappointment waits
at every low spot
It looks like a brook
Where you can lie on your lawn-chair
and ponder why things are not
......perfect
I have been in powerful moments
Where only LOVE could benefit
from the connection
It etches beauty on the heart
Of humanity's core
so that constant rejection
....shouldn't matter....anymore
Why can't I live in THAT place
And never return to sorrow
And the despair of never being enough
Someone has it better, circumstantially
While I scrap the riverbed
To live with the least amount of stuff
....my meager wage can provide
I left the longing lusts long ago
For the presence of sustaining LOVE
who picks me up again and again
I do ok, until injustice laughs in my face
Accusing me of being flaky, unsteady
no appreciation for where I am and where I've been
......I WENT TO HELL
................and I declared, "FORGIVEN!!!!!"
....................................no credit for that............it was LOVE............always LOVE.........
and He will see me to the Ocean, despite all of my babbling in this brook.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-28-2018
And how disappointment waits
at every low spot
It looks like a brook
Where you can lie on your lawn-chair
and ponder why things are not
......perfect
I have been in powerful moments
Where only LOVE could benefit
from the connection
It etches beauty on the heart
Of humanity's core
so that constant rejection
....shouldn't matter....anymore
Why can't I live in THAT place
And never return to sorrow
And the despair of never being enough
Someone has it better, circumstantially
While I scrap the riverbed
To live with the least amount of stuff
....my meager wage can provide
I left the longing lusts long ago
For the presence of sustaining LOVE
who picks me up again and again
I do ok, until injustice laughs in my face
Accusing me of being flaky, unsteady
no appreciation for where I am and where I've been
......I WENT TO HELL
................and I declared, "FORGIVEN!!!!!"
....................................no credit for that............it was LOVE............always LOVE.........
and He will see me to the Ocean, despite all of my babbling in this brook.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-28-2018
Wednesday, October 24, 2018
WHY WAY
In my younger days
I avoided punishment
Adjusting actions at authority
Early adulthood came
And I learned, at the bottom
Behaving badly buys seniority
The triangular system
Plays to the peak
Coercion cascades continuously
The middle is the best view
But the worst place to be
Deeding dimes disingenuously
Soaring past....every fake goat
Hailing intense jealousy
I made it to KINDNESS
It stuck thick and true
Flowing in spite of all fear
Letting LOVE light lenses layered
by
blindness
Finally, my heart landed on
Marriage needing open polished
Quiet questions quickly
Communication without intimacy
Requesting structured theology
Under various vials veiling victory
....................UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGG
WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY,WHY
Why am I so weird, wacky, wishful, witty....and a bit wackadoodle??????
LOVE has transformed my DNA
MY heart can't go any other way
But to the question that separates me
From the savory soup system
I'm ok with difference...actually, I'm fully alive....in DIFFERENCE
that's WHY I'm this WAY.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-24-2018
Note: I love, love, multi-layered poems, and I can only write them with Jesus leading the way. He knows how to make my heart happy :)
I avoided punishment
Adjusting actions at authority
Early adulthood came
And I learned, at the bottom
Behaving badly buys seniority
The triangular system
Plays to the peak
Coercion cascades continuously
The middle is the best view
But the worst place to be
Deeding dimes disingenuously
Soaring past....every fake goat
Hailing intense jealousy
I made it to KINDNESS
It stuck thick and true
Flowing in spite of all fear
Letting LOVE light lenses layered
by
blindness
Finally, my heart landed on
Marriage needing open polished
Quiet questions quickly
Communication without intimacy
Requesting structured theology
Under various vials veiling victory
....................UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGG
WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY,WHY
Why am I so weird, wacky, wishful, witty....and a bit wackadoodle??????
LOVE has transformed my DNA
MY heart can't go any other way
But to the question that separates me
From the savory soup system
I'm ok with difference...actually, I'm fully alive....in DIFFERENCE
that's WHY I'm this WAY.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-24-2018
Note: I love, love, multi-layered poems, and I can only write them with Jesus leading the way. He knows how to make my heart happy :)
Sunday, October 21, 2018
LIVING IN BETWEEN
She closed the book
With the evidence etched on her heart
How can she go forward
Without knowing WHERE to start
Going from this abyss to understanding
He jerked the report out of the doctor's hand
He could be gone today, tomorrow
Without TIME to make a simple plan
Why is SEX so important to being
Can't I just be undetermined
Living....in between...the line
Of knowing and learning
WHO I AM
He passed a mirror and saw his breasts
"If I were a woman It could be expected
Why can't it be in a normal place
Where speaking the condition doesn't get me disrespected?"
She can't unlearn what WISDOM has birthed
Nor can she continue on this path
She will finish the course...in between
Standing strong against fear of wrath
They hate me, my LOVE
Why does my presence bring lack to light
I just wanna be me in every moment
A ray of hope in the thick of night
THAT's WHO I AM
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-21-2018
With the evidence etched on her heart
How can she go forward
Without knowing WHERE to start
Going from this abyss to understanding
He jerked the report out of the doctor's hand
He could be gone today, tomorrow
Without TIME to make a simple plan
Why is SEX so important to being
Can't I just be undetermined
Living....in between...the line
Of knowing and learning
WHO I AM
He passed a mirror and saw his breasts
"If I were a woman It could be expected
Why can't it be in a normal place
Where speaking the condition doesn't get me disrespected?"
She can't unlearn what WISDOM has birthed
Nor can she continue on this path
She will finish the course...in between
Standing strong against fear of wrath
They hate me, my LOVE
Why does my presence bring lack to light
I just wanna be me in every moment
A ray of hope in the thick of night
THAT's WHO I AM
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-21-2018
Friday, October 19, 2018
RADICAL REVIVAL
 |
| Summing it Up (google) |
After I had my "Come to Jesus Meeting" with Jesus, we had an understanding: No Holy Spirit stuff...Period!!! My problem with the Pentecostal religion was that in practice, feelings seemed to have the throne rather than TRUTH, unmovable, unshakable TRUTH, that applies to all people, all nations, and all difference. Early on, I decided to fix my eyes on the LIGHT who is TRUTH and He would led me. As He led, I would know HIM and who is on the earth. A full 28 years later, this is what I know.
Spiritual Movement has nothing to do the 5 senses. As a matter of fact, if it does, it is not from the SPIRIT of TRUTH (https://poetrudy45.blogspot.com/2018/05/universal-laws.html). Movement in the Spiritual realm is fluid, with fear moving through thought and LOVE (Spirit/not spiritual, there's a difference) moving through word (Truth) and deed (Compassion). It has nothing to do with morality, circumstances affecting humanity, etc. God is Spirit, Spirit is LOVE, God is LOVE; therefore, all that is spirit is LOVE oriented. That puts a different spin on things, doesn't it. So, when it comes to the gifts of the spirit, prophecy in particular, why would LOVE take away your power of choice when He sent His only SON to die for your power of choice, if he condones "fortune-telling" in His church? True Prophecy reveals the process of LOVE throughout time. Time is folded, and this is why no "time constraints" can touch spirit. LOVE can not be touched by anything other than hope and it cannot be possessed (Ba'al) or defined. LOVE IS!!! If you need the attributes of LOVE 1 Corinthians 13 is your guide. When LOVE appears, He is identified within the opportunity being provided, by being all of those things at once. Can you see the problem???
 |
| Seeing Self in Others (google) |
This article outlines the history of "Spiritual Revival," and although it is interesting, it does not clearly demark between spirit movement within the spiritual realm and its effect on the natural. The Bible is a SPIRIT book and can not be interpreted naturally. Israel is a SPIRIT nation and is the focal point of world movement. http://patrickmorley.com/blog/2015/6/23/a-brief-history-of-spiritual-revival-and-awakening-in-america. If we ever want revival in these last days, it can NOT be SPIRITUAL in nature. It must be SPIRIT. Can't you see that the LOVE revival has been underway for a least a decade. In the end, the war is between LOVE and fear, and LOVE wins.
 |
| Spiritual Warfare (google) |
And finally, one more article that will bring some hope: https://www.powerofpositivity.com/6-signs-prove-world-experiencing-spiritual-awakening/
Thursday, October 11, 2018
LIAR LAIR
Once, a young woman traveled a path
So tired of darkness and lies
A light flashed in the west
And hope took her by surprise
A voice said, "Never veer to the right or left
Always walk straight and true
The enemy longs to possess your soul
By luring the wicked heart to do
...........WRONG!!!!"
She stopped in her tracks
And sighed with a downward slump
Telling herself there is no light
And she might as well give up
Again it came, she wasn't wrong
And threw herself into a reckless run
She had finally found the eternal light
And darkest night is over...and DONE
........YES! YES! YES!
Trees, lush green trees, and fruit
Just smell the fresh ripe vegetation
Life is beautiful, again
And she began to take sustenance without hesitation
Sweet to the taste, lingering on her tongue
But bitter in her stomach when the chewing was done
A deep, subtle sense of dread began to arise
From the pit of her unhinged soul
It's a trap, promise of light
You FOOL...you will NEVER BE WHOLE!!!
laughter rang out in her head
as she wondered about being dead
Sorrow, such anguish thickened deep and wide
Nowhere to hide in this crazy messed up mind
A thought appeared...how did I get here
An answer set itself on the throne of her heart
"You thought you had the knowledge necessary
To finish any journey you ventured to start"
She asked, "Well, what's wrong with that!?!"
The answer said, "Do you know all that is, was and is to come?"
She rummaged around for any evidence that she might
Until the answer showed her the path she had run
Humbled, and sober-minded by truth
She took answers hand
And walked away with LOVE
And a heart of compassion for herself and her fellow man.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-11-18
Note: Revisiting a place I came out of over 10 years ago.
So tired of darkness and lies
A light flashed in the west
And hope took her by surprise
A voice said, "Never veer to the right or left
Always walk straight and true
The enemy longs to possess your soul
By luring the wicked heart to do
...........WRONG!!!!"
She stopped in her tracks
And sighed with a downward slump
Telling herself there is no light
And she might as well give up
Again it came, she wasn't wrong
And threw herself into a reckless run
She had finally found the eternal light
And darkest night is over...and DONE
........YES! YES! YES!
Trees, lush green trees, and fruit
Just smell the fresh ripe vegetation
Life is beautiful, again
And she began to take sustenance without hesitation
Sweet to the taste, lingering on her tongue
But bitter in her stomach when the chewing was done
A deep, subtle sense of dread began to arise
From the pit of her unhinged soul
It's a trap, promise of light
You FOOL...you will NEVER BE WHOLE!!!
laughter rang out in her head
as she wondered about being dead
Sorrow, such anguish thickened deep and wide
Nowhere to hide in this crazy messed up mind
A thought appeared...how did I get here
An answer set itself on the throne of her heart
"You thought you had the knowledge necessary
To finish any journey you ventured to start"
She asked, "Well, what's wrong with that!?!"
The answer said, "Do you know all that is, was and is to come?"
She rummaged around for any evidence that she might
Until the answer showed her the path she had run
Humbled, and sober-minded by truth
She took answers hand
And walked away with LOVE
And a heart of compassion for herself and her fellow man.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-11-18
Note: Revisiting a place I came out of over 10 years ago.
Tuesday, October 9, 2018
DISSECTING DIFFERENCE
Observe, listen, and enter in
Limit your words to concepts that mean
....hope
Moments pass into eons
Waiting for the opportunity to seem
....right
I speak
leak
and quickly retreat
To think some more
Once, I expressed anger
And demons were the result
I experienced depression
And was reprimanded for being selfish
I was overwhelmed by suicide
And was given the HOTLINE
I ran into the heart of a man
And was told to get out at once
I lost all that this life could hold
Not even my name, is mine
....and I wonder
While others are dissecting my difference
Shall I give them the outcome needed
.....for justification of every accusation
Or do I stand strong against the fears
That leer and try to steer my words
.....in the terror of love without error
........and continue to be the bearer of GOOD NEWS
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-09-2018
Limit your words to concepts that mean
....hope
Moments pass into eons
Waiting for the opportunity to seem
....right
I speak
leak
and quickly retreat
To think some more
Once, I expressed anger
And demons were the result
I experienced depression
And was reprimanded for being selfish
I was overwhelmed by suicide
And was given the HOTLINE
I ran into the heart of a man
And was told to get out at once
I lost all that this life could hold
Not even my name, is mine
....and I wonder
While others are dissecting my difference
Shall I give them the outcome needed
.....for justification of every accusation
Or do I stand strong against the fears
That leer and try to steer my words
.....in the terror of love without error
........and continue to be the bearer of GOOD NEWS
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-09-2018
HUNGRY HIPPOS
They sit around a marble table
Eating their crumpets and cakes
Careful to take in the best
And point out every mistake
The fork is loaded with beefy words
And the spoon hoists up thick soup
The main course is delicate and small
While desert perfectly completes the group
But over in the corner, toward the back
Is a wooden table, splintered and broken
Only the servants sit and binge, every night
On the crumbly pieces of hope, thrown out, as a token
........to the wretches
If the roles were reversed, the poor wouldn't eat
They would fast a meal, rather than speak
.........black bean soup
The humbled sit at their table with sober minds
Knowing that circumstances blow in and out like the wind
Once they were rich and famous, and full of life
And now, they are nothing more than servants, once again
The system workers, build their castles
And love to dissect, detect under the need to protect
.......the wretches
But when the day is done, and their race is run
Empty and full are the stomachs of both servant and the elect
......no matter what feeds the appetite
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-09-2018
Eating their crumpets and cakes
Careful to take in the best
And point out every mistake
The fork is loaded with beefy words
And the spoon hoists up thick soup
The main course is delicate and small
While desert perfectly completes the group
But over in the corner, toward the back
Is a wooden table, splintered and broken
Only the servants sit and binge, every night
On the crumbly pieces of hope, thrown out, as a token
........to the wretches
If the roles were reversed, the poor wouldn't eat
They would fast a meal, rather than speak
.........black bean soup
The humbled sit at their table with sober minds
Knowing that circumstances blow in and out like the wind
Once they were rich and famous, and full of life
And now, they are nothing more than servants, once again
The system workers, build their castles
And love to dissect, detect under the need to protect
.......the wretches
But when the day is done, and their race is run
Empty and full are the stomachs of both servant and the elect
......no matter what feeds the appetite
Written by Trudy Schrader on 10-09-2018
Saturday, October 6, 2018
FAMILIAR FRIENDS
He sat at the table
Playing cards with friends
Caring for nothing
Just trying to win
She sat on the couch
Giggling with her BFF's
Caring for nothing
Just trying not to be left
.........Alone
He's pumping iron
At the local gym
Caring for nothing
Just trying to trim
.........excess
She's falling from high
For the thrill of the jump
Caring for nothing
Just trying not to bump
.........sharp edges
He stops to see
Something passed by
Trying to care for nothing
But...that, image...stuck in his eye
She gasped for air
Death but a step away
Trying to care for nothing
But....breath...can not stay
.....someONE is walking
He is compelled to follow
She longs to know who let her live
But the familiar friends call out
And both are back...but with a sieve
.....to find TRUTH again
...................but only when needed.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 09-06-2018
Playing cards with friends
Caring for nothing
Just trying to win
She sat on the couch
Giggling with her BFF's
Caring for nothing
Just trying not to be left
.........Alone
He's pumping iron
At the local gym
Caring for nothing
Just trying to trim
.........excess
She's falling from high
For the thrill of the jump
Caring for nothing
Just trying not to bump
.........sharp edges
He stops to see
Something passed by
Trying to care for nothing
But...that, image...stuck in his eye
She gasped for air
Death but a step away
Trying to care for nothing
But....breath...can not stay
.....someONE is walking
He is compelled to follow
She longs to know who let her live
But the familiar friends call out
And both are back...but with a sieve
.....to find TRUTH again
...................but only when needed.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 09-06-2018
Sunday, September 30, 2018
WOUNDED WORDS
You need to do this
It would be better if you
...did it my way
My way, well, I don't know
I'm still figuring it out
....along the way
Ways,days, leave me dazed
With confusion, illusion, and conclusions
....that never pan out
But I want you to listen
I have important things to say
....I'm a poet, for goodness sake
Words, like perfectly formed turds
Still stink when they are delivered
....no matter how tightly wound
A wounded wound, makes a distinguished sound
On the piano of the heart
....like a weighted string
B R e
a
k
ing.....trying to take on one more note
The pressure of holding it together
Giving way...to the thud, of words
.....pianos float notes...not words
The beauty of rhythm and flow, gone
The whipping of the string, finally free
....to make noise in the air
with WHOever is there
daring to care
for the broken great.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 09-30-2018
Note: Fear communications are so damaging...just had to walk away. Also, it's a wounded (injury) wound (past tense of wind...ahhh...words make me silly with joy).
It would be better if you
...did it my way
My way, well, I don't know
I'm still figuring it out
....along the way
Ways,days, leave me dazed
With confusion, illusion, and conclusions
....that never pan out
But I want you to listen
I have important things to say
....I'm a poet, for goodness sake
Words, like perfectly formed turds
Still stink when they are delivered
....no matter how tightly wound
A wounded wound, makes a distinguished sound
On the piano of the heart
....like a weighted string
B R e
a
k
ing.....trying to take on one more note
The pressure of holding it together
Giving way...to the thud, of words
.....pianos float notes...not words
The beauty of rhythm and flow, gone
The whipping of the string, finally free
....to make noise in the air
with WHOever is there
daring to care
for the broken great.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 09-30-2018
Note: Fear communications are so damaging...just had to walk away. Also, it's a wounded (injury) wound (past tense of wind...ahhh...words make me silly with joy).
Wednesday, September 5, 2018
ELUL EVIDENCED
Once, an old man sat at a bar
Seemingly, alone in the woods
The Falls were just over there
Above all of his shunned shoulds of good
Too great to enter into regret
He suckered anger instead
Justifying all his words and deeds
It was right how he LED
...his life
He kept his back to the river
His bed was dry and parched
The river refused to come near
The fort where hatred marched
His drink left him thirsty
His life drew a line in the sand
Here sits a washed up professional
Who can't face the River like a man
...and conquer
A wind blew up, against his ear
And whispered,"Turn around,"
All the fears that hemmed him in
Arose and begin to surround
"You can not hold her
She is liquid, fierce like a lion
She will maul you, eat you for dinner
And cover the place where your body is lyin'
...on the bed of stone
If you think you are forgotten...now
With her, your existence is erased
Forget being humiliated
You will be debased
May your eyes never behold
The Way the rivers runs
Stay where it is safe and lonely
And your life's work is done
....for the record"
The wind became a pressing
Deep within the seat of his soul
Even if he perished in his find
At least he would finally know
The power of his fears
And the freedom of perfect sight
With all the courage life had dragged to this spot
He turned....to see light...flash...then night
....thud, something fell
He saw a baby, but the river
Rushed to cover perception
New life is in the River
From infertility to conception
He jumped off his stool
And plunged into the deepest part
To retrieve the infant he saw
But in the process, he lost his heart
....to LOVE
Written by Trudy Schrader on 09-05-2018
Seemingly, alone in the woods
The Falls were just over there
Above all of his shunned shoulds of good
Too great to enter into regret
He suckered anger instead
Justifying all his words and deeds
It was right how he LED
...his life
He kept his back to the river
His bed was dry and parched
The river refused to come near
The fort where hatred marched
His drink left him thirsty
His life drew a line in the sand
Here sits a washed up professional
Who can't face the River like a man
...and conquer
A wind blew up, against his ear
And whispered,"Turn around,"
All the fears that hemmed him in
Arose and begin to surround
"You can not hold her
She is liquid, fierce like a lion
She will maul you, eat you for dinner
And cover the place where your body is lyin'
...on the bed of stone
If you think you are forgotten...now
With her, your existence is erased
Forget being humiliated
You will be debased
May your eyes never behold
The Way the rivers runs
Stay where it is safe and lonely
And your life's work is done
....for the record"
The wind became a pressing
Deep within the seat of his soul
Even if he perished in his find
At least he would finally know
The power of his fears
And the freedom of perfect sight
With all the courage life had dragged to this spot
He turned....to see light...flash...then night
....thud, something fell
He saw a baby, but the river
Rushed to cover perception
New life is in the River
From infertility to conception
He jumped off his stool
And plunged into the deepest part
To retrieve the infant he saw
But in the process, he lost his heart
....to LOVE
Written by Trudy Schrader on 09-05-2018
Sunday, September 2, 2018
POSH PRETENSE
If I stripped you of your garments
And gave you my rags to wear
Would you feel the fear and anguish
Of thinking I care
If I took away your high position
And brought you to my estate
Would you believe that I think
You are no longer an educated great
If a storm blew down your house
And leveled the playing field
Would you think I uttered a prayer
That held the sickle to wield
....such destruction
If I took away your friends
And left you with empty connection
Would you think I am the reason
For such unanimous rejection
If I left you bare, naked and hungry
On the street to live or die
Would you choose to believe
That LOVE would never cry
....a single tear
What you don't know, is that I am,
Already at the place you still fear
The only difference is that POSH PRETENSE
Pushed me away, when LOVE drew me near
Written by Trudy Schrader on 09-02-2018
And gave you my rags to wear
Would you feel the fear and anguish
Of thinking I care
If I took away your high position
And brought you to my estate
Would you believe that I think
You are no longer an educated great
If a storm blew down your house
And leveled the playing field
Would you think I uttered a prayer
That held the sickle to wield
....such destruction
If I took away your friends
And left you with empty connection
Would you think I am the reason
For such unanimous rejection
If I left you bare, naked and hungry
On the street to live or die
Would you choose to believe
That LOVE would never cry
....a single tear
What you don't know, is that I am,
Already at the place you still fear
The only difference is that POSH PRETENSE
Pushed me away, when LOVE drew me near
Written by Trudy Schrader on 09-02-2018
Friday, August 31, 2018
AVERAGE ADJUSTMENT
Again, this place, again
Nothing new under the sun
What I'm experiencing anew
Has already been done
Back in '92, I almost gave up
But I pressed into the pain
I faced my past with courage
And used my loss for gain
I've stopped dreaming of magic
And that a happy ending awaits
Instead, I live and love in moments
Constantly adjusting my plate
Today, grief is on the menu
Bitter sorrow rises, again, in my throat
Not to worry, just my harmony
Hitting a sour note
Look, there's Morticia on the piano
Pounding out the black soot
Even with the chains of loss
Wrapped, tightly, around her foot
Without the minor keys in living
There would be no need for major strikes
Although I will adjust my playing
It will no longer be based on unanimous likes
.....because I'm finally at home in me
written by Trudy Schrader on 08-31-2018
Nothing new under the sun
What I'm experiencing anew
Has already been done
Back in '92, I almost gave up
But I pressed into the pain
I faced my past with courage
And used my loss for gain
I've stopped dreaming of magic
And that a happy ending awaits
Instead, I live and love in moments
Constantly adjusting my plate
Today, grief is on the menu
Bitter sorrow rises, again, in my throat
Not to worry, just my harmony
Hitting a sour note
Look, there's Morticia on the piano
Pounding out the black soot
Even with the chains of loss
Wrapped, tightly, around her foot
Without the minor keys in living
There would be no need for major strikes
Although I will adjust my playing
It will no longer be based on unanimous likes
.....because I'm finally at home in me
written by Trudy Schrader on 08-31-2018
Friday, August 24, 2018
FUNNY GIRL
When the day is dreary and dark
And hope is next to death
Funny girl will make you laugh
Til you snort in your next breath
Entering a new situation
With groups of people all around
Funny girl will be in the center
Bringing vibration to melodic sound
When truth is hard to swallow
And choking seems so unfair
Funny girl will make you die
In hysterics 'til you forget to care
When tears threaten to spill
Down your cheeks, unbidden and unrestrained
Funny girl will change your position
Til you have giggled yourself insane
How could that be...wrong
Making people laugh is fun
Funny girl doesn't understand
Why she has no place to run
...no one wants to hear her sorrow.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-24-2018
And hope is next to death
Funny girl will make you laugh
Til you snort in your next breath
Entering a new situation
With groups of people all around
Funny girl will be in the center
Bringing vibration to melodic sound
When truth is hard to swallow
And choking seems so unfair
Funny girl will make you die
In hysterics 'til you forget to care
When tears threaten to spill
Down your cheeks, unbidden and unrestrained
Funny girl will change your position
Til you have giggled yourself insane
How could that be...wrong
Making people laugh is fun
Funny girl doesn't understand
Why she has no place to run
...no one wants to hear her sorrow.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-24-2018
Wednesday, August 22, 2018
BEING HOMELESS
I lived at a women's shelter for 2 years, and even though I was, technically, homeless, I was not without resources. While I was there, I saw, that resources and connection with others are the dividing line between the "hidden homeless" and the "on the streets" homeless. In order to receive benefits from entitlement programs, you have to have an address. In order to have an address, you have to have a job or a connection with someone who can assist as you get back on your feet. Seeing the system from a homeless perspective, one could easily and accurately conclude that it serves the educated homeless, and gives a clear message to humanity, "If you navigate the system incorrectly through wrong choices, the system will be against you, and allow you to experience the consequences of those choices, alone."
My perspective began to change in 2014, from doing nothing, even avoiding places where "they" hang out to advertise homelessness, to seeing them and saying a prayer. One day, when I was coming out of Wal-Mart, I heard myself praying, "God please help no one to be there. I don't want to see them." Daddy God asked, "Why are you afraid?" I blurted out, "I'm a single mom, struggling myself. What could I possibly offer?" Daddy God said, "What is in your hand?" I looked in the seat at the $5 hot pizza I had bought for dinner, and smiled. I pulled up to the man, and gave him the pizza. He said, "God is good. God bless you." Them became a him, and I transformed into an empowered woman who began looking, actively, for LOVE opportunities.
My boys went to live with their dad and I went to live with my mother and sister. I had never been separated from my miracle boys. I was wrecked. In spite of it all, I picked myself up and began applying for jobs, and reentered the Graduate Counseling program at JBU. I substitute taught in local schools just to have some income. In March 2018, the job Daddy God delivered to my table, was being a crew person at McDonald's. God does have a wonderful sense of humor, and has a perfect answer to the homeless...meet them in their environment.
I am a morning person, so my shift is early morning to early afternoon. Since McDonald's is open 24/7, the door is open all the time. I have seen, on several occasions, loaded cars parked close to the door, with a sleeping person at the wheel. One morning, a couple sat at a table, with a broken down box, full of belongings, and nothing to eat or drink. Normally, that is loitering, and they would be driven out, but the night managers are very understanding and compassionate. I watched the woman, going over a Wal-Mart receipt, like she was trying to find a way to come up with money. I allowed myself to enter into their hopelessness, and asked them if they would like to eat. He answered, "We are flat broke." I said, "It's on me." The couple that had ordered at the Kiosk and had sit down to eat, left abruptly, when I brought the struggling couple their food. A few minutes after the struggling couple finished eating and left, an employee came in and said, "A couple of meth-heads are in the dumpster, digging through the trash." I sighed in my heart.
The answer to homelessness is not to throw a benevolent b.m. at the "problem," so that the conscious mind can be relieved from awareness. It requires one heart meeting another at the point of fear/anxiety/hopelessness/despair, and being present in their pain. There is such a push to "fix" something and get on with living. I fight that actively while relaxing in LOVE, realizing I have nothing more to offer than my presence in the problem. I am so grateful for my homelessness, because I have conquered my fears that had separated me from opportunities with the homeless. We are all part of humanity, and our hearts respond to LOVE offered in the flow of living. Circumstances may change status, but connection renews faith and hope in living.
Tuesday, August 21, 2018
EMPTY ENVY
As I traveled with my LOVE
Down the River of Life
Keeping my eyes on the WAY
And my boat free from envy and strife
....I noticed something
Others had boats, big and small
While mine was a raft of wood
They had shelter, a home
While I OWNED nothing good
....just my lunchbox
Until the sighting of difference
I had been happy and adjusted
To living a life of adventure
And free from all things that rusted
....old and useless
My heart began to sink within
As I saw my value inside those temporal things
Others enjoy their lives
And are made better by all the River brings
....I'm empty still
My LOVE appeared on my raft
And said, "Why are you downcast within
Don't you know the TRUTH
That your raft is a testament of where I have been
....I see you naked
I can't enter their boats yet
While they cling to safety and stuff
The River rolls possessions to their boat
And they take like they will never have enough
....just look in your lunchbox"
I opened it and exclaimed,
"It's enough food for this day."
I embraced my LOVE
And made peace with the difference in my way
....rolling, rolling on the River
.......da doot doot doot
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-21-2018
Down the River of Life
Keeping my eyes on the WAY
And my boat free from envy and strife
....I noticed something
Others had boats, big and small
While mine was a raft of wood
They had shelter, a home
While I OWNED nothing good
....just my lunchbox
Until the sighting of difference
I had been happy and adjusted
To living a life of adventure
And free from all things that rusted
....old and useless
My heart began to sink within
As I saw my value inside those temporal things
Others enjoy their lives
And are made better by all the River brings
....I'm empty still
My LOVE appeared on my raft
And said, "Why are you downcast within
Don't you know the TRUTH
That your raft is a testament of where I have been
....I see you naked
I can't enter their boats yet
While they cling to safety and stuff
The River rolls possessions to their boat
And they take like they will never have enough
....just look in your lunchbox"
I opened it and exclaimed,
"It's enough food for this day."
I embraced my LOVE
And made peace with the difference in my way
....rolling, rolling on the River
.......da doot doot doot
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-21-2018
Monday, August 13, 2018
SKIPPING STONES
The little ones stand on the river bed
Bored, with the beauty of silence
Looking for excitement and adventure
They discovered stones, and the fun of violence
As the water rushed to the ocean
In a smooth, steady, rhythmical sound
The stones broke the surface
Where peace was taken, and annoyance was found
As the rocks got bigger and came faster
The river began to ROAR at the offenders
She forgot they were just children
Without the wisdom that violence hinders
....the flow of LOVE...
Drenched with overflow of water
The children dashed away in great fear
The river, eventually, silenced itself
And wondered if the violators would reappear
She couldn't explain it, but unrest surfaced
No more could she rest in her continual flow
She became guarded and edgy
Pushing with too much force, wanting to know
Something, anything, could happen again
And she would be disturbed in her rest
By stupid little children, without reason
Having a contest on who could pop her the best
....right in the heart...
Wait, the river began to see people, afar off
But never drawing near to her bank
She knew she was still the river
But what had her attack....
...yes, no way around it...
she attacked....what else could they think
The river drew back her waters in shame
And her bed became exposed and dry
She was just about to give up
When LOVE came to her bank to cry
LOVE said, "Unrest has troubled you
And taken the peace from your heart
There will always be little ones
Who don't know where you end and where you start
It is not enough to flow in freedom
Toward your ever giving source
You must endure all things with all people
And never show your natural force
....propagating LOVE, not fear."
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-13-2018
Bored, with the beauty of silence
Looking for excitement and adventure
They discovered stones, and the fun of violence
As the water rushed to the ocean
In a smooth, steady, rhythmical sound
The stones broke the surface
Where peace was taken, and annoyance was found
As the rocks got bigger and came faster
The river began to ROAR at the offenders
She forgot they were just children
Without the wisdom that violence hinders
....the flow of LOVE...
Drenched with overflow of water
The children dashed away in great fear
The river, eventually, silenced itself
And wondered if the violators would reappear
She couldn't explain it, but unrest surfaced
No more could she rest in her continual flow
She became guarded and edgy
Pushing with too much force, wanting to know
Something, anything, could happen again
And she would be disturbed in her rest
By stupid little children, without reason
Having a contest on who could pop her the best
....right in the heart...
Wait, the river began to see people, afar off
But never drawing near to her bank
She knew she was still the river
But what had her attack....
...yes, no way around it...
she attacked....what else could they think
The river drew back her waters in shame
And her bed became exposed and dry
She was just about to give up
When LOVE came to her bank to cry
LOVE said, "Unrest has troubled you
And taken the peace from your heart
There will always be little ones
Who don't know where you end and where you start
It is not enough to flow in freedom
Toward your ever giving source
You must endure all things with all people
And never show your natural force
....propagating LOVE, not fear."
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-13-2018
Wednesday, August 8, 2018
WHITE-WASHED WISDOM
I was doing just fine
Atop my mountain of white
Where I could touch, better sinners
With luminescent light
I could proclaim, "Forgiven"
To those on the right road
And not think about the scum
Laden with the weighty load
...of filthy lusts
Such a sleepless night
Tossing and flopping in my bed
Wondering what on earth
I hadn't rendered dead
I saw the River rushing
Toward a frightful end
Fighting off the embrace of dread
That might be around the bend
...of a clogged drain
Suddenly, I let go, and released
Ideal...from a mighty height
As I plunged downward
To the wrong of my right
The River bed was...almost dry
And I saw a man sitting at a bar
I looked up at where I had been
My heart broke as I comprehended how far
....forgiven was from the Well
I argued, look at that man
Sitting there with his pretty little find
He doesn't get to be forgiven
With a perverted mind
Come to think of it, my LOVE
I don't recall you dealing with molestors
Your own mother was a child
Carefully and shamefully sequestered
...due to her sinful womb
There is a secret you know
That I have yet to embrace
All of us are your children
With a unique color and assigned place
I will work on allowing LOVE
To be what HE is in the space provided
And edeavor to dismiss judgment
When Wisdom is divided
....on the CROSSroad
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-08-2018
Atop my mountain of white
Where I could touch, better sinners
With luminescent light
I could proclaim, "Forgiven"
To those on the right road
And not think about the scum
Laden with the weighty load
...of filthy lusts
Such a sleepless night
Tossing and flopping in my bed
Wondering what on earth
I hadn't rendered dead
I saw the River rushing
Toward a frightful end
Fighting off the embrace of dread
That might be around the bend
...of a clogged drain
Suddenly, I let go, and released
Ideal...from a mighty height
As I plunged downward
To the wrong of my right
The River bed was...almost dry
And I saw a man sitting at a bar
I looked up at where I had been
My heart broke as I comprehended how far
....forgiven was from the Well
I argued, look at that man
Sitting there with his pretty little find
He doesn't get to be forgiven
With a perverted mind
Come to think of it, my LOVE
I don't recall you dealing with molestors
Your own mother was a child
Carefully and shamefully sequestered
...due to her sinful womb
There is a secret you know
That I have yet to embrace
All of us are your children
With a unique color and assigned place
I will work on allowing LOVE
To be what HE is in the space provided
And edeavor to dismiss judgment
When Wisdom is divided
....on the CROSSroad
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-08-2018
Monday, August 6, 2018
RIVER RAFTING
Generally, the flow of the river
Is engaging, wonderful, inviting
My LOVE wanted to take me rafting
So that I could learn what humanity is fighting
To the left, I see an abandoned child
Sleeping on the thorny bank
Suddenly, a boulder arose
And my heart sank
....to the bottom
The rocks cut my feet
As I walked the rocky bed
I saw an orphan
Who had been left for dead
Then I saw a child
Yell profanity's at his mother
As he expressed his anger
At being held accountable for another
...bottom feeder
An old and dear friend
Shunned my open arms of care
Though I have full reign of the River
She pushed me to stay where
...she'd placed me
An elderly man escorts a child
To buy her physical affection
Without natural affinity
To fight and ensure her protection
But the loaded gun
I took from the child's hand
Was Mama making him responsible
For his baby brother in Playland
...while she grew fat
As I realized that I can't shoot
And I'm opposed to the handling of steal
I passed it to my LOVE
And floated up to the top to embrace what is real
We finished our ride through humanity
To a decision that had to be made
Hopelessness pushed to blacken LOVE
But it was to LOVE, I freely laid
...despair
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-06-2018
Is engaging, wonderful, inviting
My LOVE wanted to take me rafting
So that I could learn what humanity is fighting
To the left, I see an abandoned child
Sleeping on the thorny bank
Suddenly, a boulder arose
And my heart sank
....to the bottom
The rocks cut my feet
As I walked the rocky bed
I saw an orphan
Who had been left for dead
Then I saw a child
Yell profanity's at his mother
As he expressed his anger
At being held accountable for another
...bottom feeder
An old and dear friend
Shunned my open arms of care
Though I have full reign of the River
She pushed me to stay where
...she'd placed me
An elderly man escorts a child
To buy her physical affection
Without natural affinity
To fight and ensure her protection
But the loaded gun
I took from the child's hand
Was Mama making him responsible
For his baby brother in Playland
...while she grew fat
As I realized that I can't shoot
And I'm opposed to the handling of steal
I passed it to my LOVE
And floated up to the top to embrace what is real
We finished our ride through humanity
To a decision that had to be made
Hopelessness pushed to blacken LOVE
But it was to LOVE, I freely laid
...despair
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-06-2018
Sunday, August 5, 2018
SEWING SEAMS
I saw the difference you made
To the barrenness of your mother
Then I saw you poke fun at a worker
Who thought you were a good lover
...of sewing seams
I saw you reach out to a man
Who struggled to sit still
Then, I saw you ask another
To provide him with a decent meal
...so, it would seem
....LOVE has a question
I heard you spout out your beliefs
With a superior tone of knowledge
Then I heard anger in your voice
As you tried to push him to the edge
....of that perfect seam
I saw you give a dirty woman
Some clothes, food, and some water
Then, I saw you ignore
The silent, but very present, cry from your beautiful daughter
...who wanted to sew your seem
....LOVE wants to know
I saw your quick response
To a fallen man in need of medical attention
Then, you yell at your son
Who earned himself a scholastic detention
....for sewing seems incorrectly
I heard your lecture on the gospel
To a crowd of would be saints
I saw me, sitting in the pocket of the seam
And knew I ain't
....anything like a seam/seem
....LOVE has hemmed me in HIS seam/seem
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-05-2018
Note: I absolutely LOVE words!!! I hope you see, clearly, what I glimpsed, nearly, in the seam/seem :)
To the barrenness of your mother
Then I saw you poke fun at a worker
Who thought you were a good lover
...of sewing seams
I saw you reach out to a man
Who struggled to sit still
Then, I saw you ask another
To provide him with a decent meal
...so, it would seem
....LOVE has a question
I heard you spout out your beliefs
With a superior tone of knowledge
Then I heard anger in your voice
As you tried to push him to the edge
....of that perfect seam
I saw you give a dirty woman
Some clothes, food, and some water
Then, I saw you ignore
The silent, but very present, cry from your beautiful daughter
...who wanted to sew your seem
....LOVE wants to know
I saw your quick response
To a fallen man in need of medical attention
Then, you yell at your son
Who earned himself a scholastic detention
....for sewing seems incorrectly
I heard your lecture on the gospel
To a crowd of would be saints
I saw me, sitting in the pocket of the seam
And knew I ain't
....anything like a seam/seem
....LOVE has hemmed me in HIS seam/seem
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-05-2018
Note: I absolutely LOVE words!!! I hope you see, clearly, what I glimpsed, nearly, in the seam/seem :)
Friday, August 3, 2018
BANGING BANGS
Finally, my way is clear
I can see the the beauty in all
Things others don't notice
Or dismiss, as insignificant, small
The sound of water flowing
The smell of crisp clean air
Inundates my being
With what all living things share
I let go of all my fears
And open my eyes
Only to see stupid bangs
Hiding the revelation that cries
.................to be KNOWN
Fighting against their presence
Despising the hair on my head
Life drains from wonder
And plummets me into the lake of the dead
The sunlight shines down
Piercing the comfort of sight
I move my bangs for full vision
To reveal I've lost my light
After much struggle and anger
I leave my bangs where they are
And I begin to perceive
The blood, torn flesh, the scars
I just wanted to see and enjoy
But bangs, like a curtain, got hung
Between the spirit and natural worlds
With the rhythm of "Broken" continually sung
....with every BANG of BELIEF
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-03-2018
I can see the the beauty in all
Things others don't notice
Or dismiss, as insignificant, small
The sound of water flowing
The smell of crisp clean air
Inundates my being
With what all living things share
I let go of all my fears
And open my eyes
Only to see stupid bangs
Hiding the revelation that cries
.................to be KNOWN
Fighting against their presence
Despising the hair on my head
Life drains from wonder
And plummets me into the lake of the dead
The sunlight shines down
Piercing the comfort of sight
I move my bangs for full vision
To reveal I've lost my light
After much struggle and anger
I leave my bangs where they are
And I begin to perceive
The blood, torn flesh, the scars
I just wanted to see and enjoy
But bangs, like a curtain, got hung
Between the spirit and natural worlds
With the rhythm of "Broken" continually sung
....with every BANG of BELIEF
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-03-2018
Thursday, August 2, 2018
HUMANETICS HIGHWAY
I saw a woman
Carrying water on her head
Thousands of people
Without a home or bed
...but I passed in my jeep
I saw a scraggly man
Lying on the street
And strange druggies
I never want to meet
...so I passed in my taxi
I saw a waitress
With a bruise around her eye
A car accident
Where someone died
...but I passed with the others
I saw a preacher pray
And lie in the same day
I saw wedding vows exchanged
And that same marriage rearranged
...I stopped
I saw people who didn't matter
Become a part of who I am
Every interaction
Has informed growing man
...to build highways
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-02-2018
Note: The tireless, endless, seemingly meaningless work of our predecessors, has built the highways naturally, spiritually, and emotionally, that we enjoy everyday, without any recognition. When we look into the eyes of our tired elderly, may we always be in awe of what their sacrifice has made available to us.
Carrying water on her head
Thousands of people
Without a home or bed
...but I passed in my jeep
I saw a scraggly man
Lying on the street
And strange druggies
I never want to meet
...so I passed in my taxi
I saw a waitress
With a bruise around her eye
A car accident
Where someone died
...but I passed with the others
I saw a preacher pray
And lie in the same day
I saw wedding vows exchanged
And that same marriage rearranged
...I stopped
I saw people who didn't matter
Become a part of who I am
Every interaction
Has informed growing man
...to build highways
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-02-2018
Note: The tireless, endless, seemingly meaningless work of our predecessors, has built the highways naturally, spiritually, and emotionally, that we enjoy everyday, without any recognition. When we look into the eyes of our tired elderly, may we always be in awe of what their sacrifice has made available to us.
Monday, July 30, 2018
CONSIDERING CONCEPTION
Go ahead and
Flare up, scare up, even try to tare up
The seed in the ground
But soon you'll see
The sprout, wondering about, even a horrible draught
To show it's been found
.....in LOVE
Many hit against
A wall, trying to appall,the idea of The Fall
In the horrid flesh
But the spirit
Has produced, a tool that's loosed, and enduced
Unproductive labor to rest
...in Peace
Mind systems of fear
Can still inject, try to infect, move to reject the effect
Of the connection
But intimacy
Has stripped, gripped and tipped the soul
To yield its erection
...in Knowing
I am held by my Master
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-30-2018
Flare up, scare up, even try to tare up
The seed in the ground
But soon you'll see
The sprout, wondering about, even a horrible draught
To show it's been found
.....in LOVE
Many hit against
A wall, trying to appall,the idea of The Fall
In the horrid flesh
But the spirit
Has produced, a tool that's loosed, and enduced
Unproductive labor to rest
...in Peace
Mind systems of fear
Can still inject, try to infect, move to reject the effect
Of the connection
But intimacy
Has stripped, gripped and tipped the soul
To yield its erection
...in Knowing
I am held by my Master
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-30-2018
Thursday, July 19, 2018
WAYWORD
She followed love
To an unknown door
Having no idea
What she was there for
The answer to all
Unrelated to situation
Spoke the words
That rang the perfect vibration
...in her soul
He sat in a cell
Boxed in by behavior
A cook in the kitchen
Treated him to a new flavor
She smiled as she presented
The food offered to the throng
A simple gesture displayed
Gave good in the presence of wrong
...systems of thinking
The babies lie in their cribs
Too many to cuddle and hold
But a touch to each
Kept hope alive til words could unfold
Lies that have captured
A culture to believe
That girls are not valued
Beyond what their wombs can conceive
...in a nation of men
There is a Way to Word
That straightens out our mess
No experience, perspective, or position
Could lead us to guess
..........meaning
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-19-2018
To an unknown door
Having no idea
What she was there for
The answer to all
Unrelated to situation
Spoke the words
That rang the perfect vibration
...in her soul
He sat in a cell
Boxed in by behavior
A cook in the kitchen
Treated him to a new flavor
She smiled as she presented
The food offered to the throng
A simple gesture displayed
Gave good in the presence of wrong
...systems of thinking
The babies lie in their cribs
Too many to cuddle and hold
But a touch to each
Kept hope alive til words could unfold
Lies that have captured
A culture to believe
That girls are not valued
Beyond what their wombs can conceive
...in a nation of men
There is a Way to Word
That straightens out our mess
No experience, perspective, or position
Could lead us to guess
..........meaning
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-19-2018
Wednesday, July 18, 2018
MAY I HALF YOUR HEART
Maybe I misunderstood
When I agreed to honor your request
Half belongs to me
And the other, I choose to invest
....in loving you
Boundaries are important
No one can have ALL they desire
So why are you disappointed/surprised
That I don't have a ROARing fire
....in pursuit of you
After all this time together
Why would you question my comittment
We have children together
Wondering has produced resentment
....in my needing you
Now, why now, would you want ALL
Is my heart supposed to breathe for you
Shall all movements in life
Reflect the beauty of blue (means love)
....though I thrive in green (means life-giving)
Where am I if I am in you
Do I not have a "me" outside of your name
I am naked before you
Accepting that I am to blame
....for being deaf
........I didn't hear......correctly.....forgive me
....................no, HEAR me
Am I a ME on my own
Can I be seen without LOVE
What is LIFE without LOVE
No more than breathing without purpose
..hmmm
If I have no greater vision
Than to be the green inside the blue
You may HAVE my heart
If I can be your LOVE in all I say and do
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-18-2018
Note: Shema means "to hear." The whole point of the WORD, is to HEAR. When we look at the woman in Genesis 2, she didn't "hear" Daddy God, because she was inside the man when Daddy God gave instructions. She indeed made an error in her words to the serpent. Check it out, and get Revelation.
When I agreed to honor your request
Half belongs to me
And the other, I choose to invest
....in loving you
Boundaries are important
No one can have ALL they desire
So why are you disappointed/surprised
That I don't have a ROARing fire
....in pursuit of you
After all this time together
Why would you question my comittment
We have children together
Wondering has produced resentment
....in my needing you
Now, why now, would you want ALL
Is my heart supposed to breathe for you
Shall all movements in life
Reflect the beauty of blue (means love)
....though I thrive in green (means life-giving)
Where am I if I am in you
Do I not have a "me" outside of your name
I am naked before you
Accepting that I am to blame
....for being deaf
........I didn't hear......correctly.....forgive me
....................no, HEAR me
Am I a ME on my own
Can I be seen without LOVE
What is LIFE without LOVE
No more than breathing without purpose
..hmmm
If I have no greater vision
Than to be the green inside the blue
You may HAVE my heart
If I can be your LOVE in all I say and do
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-18-2018
Note: Shema means "to hear." The whole point of the WORD, is to HEAR. When we look at the woman in Genesis 2, she didn't "hear" Daddy God, because she was inside the man when Daddy God gave instructions. She indeed made an error in her words to the serpent. Check it out, and get Revelation.
Sunday, July 15, 2018
MEANING MATH
Love and marriage
Love and marriage
Go together like
A...something and carriage
....cause that rhymes
He loves me
He loves me not
She loves me
But...maybe, not
....cause I don't think I'm lovable
We're going to the chapel
And we're gonna get married
....cause, well, that's what pretty girls do
But...what if I'm not pretty
Johnny and Mary
Sittin' in a tree
K-I-SS-I-N-G
First comes love
Then comes marriage
Then comes a baby
In...a...baby....carriage
....cause that's the order of things, right
I think I'm barren
College, Great Job
Excellent Man to provide
Then a nice house and car
To show the world I've arrived
...where
For pity's sake, would someone tell me
........where are we going????
Something is missing from
The facts we've been given
No matter how much information we have
Something HUGE is missin'
Two means difference
It provides humanity a choice
But if we lean to one side
The other has no voice
....how do we know TRUTH
It has to be on the line
....in the expression of the = sign
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-15-2018
Love and marriage
Go together like
A...something and carriage
....cause that rhymes
He loves me
He loves me not
She loves me
But...maybe, not
....cause I don't think I'm lovable
We're going to the chapel
And we're gonna get married
....cause, well, that's what pretty girls do
But...what if I'm not pretty
Johnny and Mary
Sittin' in a tree
K-I-SS-I-N-G
First comes love
Then comes marriage
Then comes a baby
In...a...baby....carriage
....cause that's the order of things, right
I think I'm barren
College, Great Job
Excellent Man to provide
Then a nice house and car
To show the world I've arrived
...where
For pity's sake, would someone tell me
........where are we going????
Something is missing from
The facts we've been given
No matter how much information we have
Something HUGE is missin'
Two means difference
It provides humanity a choice
But if we lean to one side
The other has no voice
....how do we know TRUTH
It has to be on the line
....in the expression of the = sign
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-15-2018
Sunday, July 8, 2018
GRAVE GARDNER
I've been troubled
As of late
Stumbling in the darkness
To the presence of a golden gate
The moment I reach
The glistening bars
I awake, irritated
That I can only go...so...far
~then Reality~
That feeling of want
Presses me to find
Perceived treasures
In my empty mind
There has to be a key
That will open what's closed
Beyond the boundaries
Of what this world knows
~about the Sacred~
Without the all from beyond
The confines of this place
I must reconcile my knowledge
To that locked gate
Imagination and dreams
Invite the bored to entertain
That life would be better
If you possessed all you COULD gain
~without unpleasantness~
Everything in this ground
Grows with weeds and fruit together
Each plant has to fight
To not allow self to be tethered
What is this place I'm in
It seems to be a garden of death
Where the withered and worn
Lay down their last breath
~to a black earth~
And the Grave Gardner
Collects the doomed soul
Awaiting the Revelation
Of a hidden goal
~there has to be a reason~
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-08-2018
As of late
Stumbling in the darkness
To the presence of a golden gate
The moment I reach
The glistening bars
I awake, irritated
That I can only go...so...far
~then Reality~
That feeling of want
Presses me to find
Perceived treasures
In my empty mind
There has to be a key
That will open what's closed
Beyond the boundaries
Of what this world knows
~about the Sacred~
Without the all from beyond
The confines of this place
I must reconcile my knowledge
To that locked gate
Imagination and dreams
Invite the bored to entertain
That life would be better
If you possessed all you COULD gain
~without unpleasantness~
Everything in this ground
Grows with weeds and fruit together
Each plant has to fight
To not allow self to be tethered
What is this place I'm in
It seems to be a garden of death
Where the withered and worn
Lay down their last breath
~to a black earth~
And the Grave Gardner
Collects the doomed soul
Awaiting the Revelation
Of a hidden goal
~there has to be a reason~
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07-08-2018
Monday, July 2, 2018
FAMILY MATTERS
He took our stripes
To give us health
We took His stripes
To gain our wealth
He gave up His crown
To redeem our thorns
We took His crown
To blow our limitless horns
He gave us His tears
To soak our enslaved ground
We took His grief
To silence conviction's sound
He gave us His word
To fight our guilt
We took His word
To grab what others have built
He took our tree
To give us life anew
We took His tree
To do all we desire to do
He took our spear
To give us unity in spirit
We took His spear
To make a megaphone so the WORLD would hear it
............WE RULE THE UNIVERSE......
...............................because Jesus WINS!!!!
He took our grave
To give us resurrection
WE took His grave
And erected a stone of insurrection
that reads:
You did your job, Jesus
Now your family will take it from here
Our grand status, wealth, health, and intellignece
Will deliver our enemies into fear
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07/02/2018
Note: Let's get it straight...Daddy God is who we pray to, and His name is LOVE. Jesus is the Way who made it possible for us to talk to His Dad without being incinerated by a HOLY and AWESOME God. If we continue to think that the purpose of Daddy God is as small and earth bound as our biggest dream, we will never engage in His vision to make a world without FEAR!
To give us health
We took His stripes
To gain our wealth
He gave up His crown
To redeem our thorns
We took His crown
To blow our limitless horns
He gave us His tears
To soak our enslaved ground
We took His grief
To silence conviction's sound
He gave us His word
To fight our guilt
We took His word
To grab what others have built
He took our tree
To give us life anew
We took His tree
To do all we desire to do
He took our spear
To give us unity in spirit
We took His spear
To make a megaphone so the WORLD would hear it
............WE RULE THE UNIVERSE......
...............................because Jesus WINS!!!!
He took our grave
To give us resurrection
WE took His grave
And erected a stone of insurrection
that reads:
You did your job, Jesus
Now your family will take it from here
Our grand status, wealth, health, and intellignece
Will deliver our enemies into fear
Written by Trudy Schrader on 07/02/2018
Note: Let's get it straight...Daddy God is who we pray to, and His name is LOVE. Jesus is the Way who made it possible for us to talk to His Dad without being incinerated by a HOLY and AWESOME God. If we continue to think that the purpose of Daddy God is as small and earth bound as our biggest dream, we will never engage in His vision to make a world without FEAR!
Wednesday, June 27, 2018
TIME TICKER
Walking along the way
Enjoying the company every day
Careful to never take for granted
That time is slightly slanted
...to tick
Click, click, was that a hicc UP
Wait, no...what!?!
It can NOT
be true
I never noticed
That time had voted
To bring you new
opportunity
without
me
No one asked me
No one cared to see
If I was done being
If I was done with needing
your presence
the intoxicating joy
of your perfect essence
just.....gone...
It's over......you grew
Time tricked and ticked,
then
clicked you
Out of my nurturing ground
Without so much as a sound
Of warning
How can I rejoice in your growth
When you have built your own boat
With the tools I gave you from my shed
I knew you would leave one day
But never could I have imagined in the way
You left the home where I had provided a nice bed
to be at peace
It's that stupid time ticker
That takes the clicker
And runs you past the place
Where intimacy shares
And LOVE fully cares
In the moment of empty space
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-27-2018
Enjoying the company every day
Careful to never take for granted
That time is slightly slanted
...to tick
Click, click, was that a hicc UP
Wait, no...what!?!
It can NOT
be true
I never noticed
That time had voted
To bring you new
opportunity
without
me
No one asked me
No one cared to see
If I was done being
If I was done with needing
your presence
the intoxicating joy
of your perfect essence
just.....gone...
It's over......you grew
Time tricked and ticked,
then
clicked you
Out of my nurturing ground
Without so much as a sound
Of warning
How can I rejoice in your growth
When you have built your own boat
With the tools I gave you from my shed
I knew you would leave one day
But never could I have imagined in the way
You left the home where I had provided a nice bed
to be at peace
It's that stupid time ticker
That takes the clicker
And runs you past the place
Where intimacy shares
And LOVE fully cares
In the moment of empty space
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-27-2018
Wednesday, June 13, 2018
BITING BITTERNESS
I am sooo tired
Walk, walk, walk
Each step taking its toll
I'm weary of hope
Setting a new image
To press me toward a goal
What is it all about
What is the point
Suffering, buffering
.....WHAT...my lord???
Isn't it enough
That I gave my life
In your service
No one would want
A life of sorrow
A child doesn't deserve THIS
What about the lofty
Who claim you too
Shall I JUDGE
...Me....THEM...I hate!!!
Wait, what!?!
I hate, yes, I hate
This bitter taste
At least in captivity
I had enough sweet...things
I could afford to waste
......moments
No way! this can NOT be
my life...........I'm trudging IN death
I have to ask
When will it be over
Am I really coming through
What awaits me
The paradise of my mind
Or....just you
All this suffering
Has made you small
I don't serve a BIG god
Maybe you were tiny
And my heart lies open
In this desert.....
..............you have REQUIRED.....yes, REQUIRED...me to trod
..............I HATE plan B....stupid, ignorant woman of fallen man.....
You brought us the required blood of your man
Though I am far from grateful, NOW, it is a full-proof plan
....to get the IDEA of LACK....out of me
My GOD, HELP ME, FORGIVE ME
............as I enter, fully, into the bitterness of soul
Knowing that you WILLING gave up GLORY to walk me into (w)Hole (i)ness.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-13-2018
Walk, walk, walk
Each step taking its toll
I'm weary of hope
Setting a new image
To press me toward a goal
What is it all about
What is the point
Suffering, buffering
.....WHAT...my lord???
Isn't it enough
That I gave my life
In your service
No one would want
A life of sorrow
A child doesn't deserve THIS
What about the lofty
Who claim you too
Shall I JUDGE
...Me....THEM...I hate!!!
Wait, what!?!
I hate, yes, I hate
This bitter taste
At least in captivity
I had enough sweet...things
I could afford to waste
......moments
No way! this can NOT be
my life...........I'm trudging IN death
I have to ask
When will it be over
Am I really coming through
What awaits me
The paradise of my mind
Or....just you
All this suffering
Has made you small
I don't serve a BIG god
Maybe you were tiny
And my heart lies open
In this desert.....
..............you have REQUIRED.....yes, REQUIRED...me to trod
..............I HATE plan B....stupid, ignorant woman of fallen man.....
You brought us the required blood of your man
Though I am far from grateful, NOW, it is a full-proof plan
....to get the IDEA of LACK....out of me
My GOD, HELP ME, FORGIVE ME
............as I enter, fully, into the bitterness of soul
Knowing that you WILLING gave up GLORY to walk me into (w)Hole (i)ness.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-13-2018
Tuesday, June 12, 2018
UNVEILING THE UNINVITED
The Banquet Hall is adorned
With the essence of purity
White as transparent as a ray
of Eternal Light
Every movement reveals
Facets of His great LOVE
Every sound vibrates
the floating souls
Present and accounted
......as.....
~The Sacred Ones~
No one speaks
No one moves
As they are gathered
In a place
............ONLY DADDY GOD can go....
Who are they
Why does their place seem...off limits
More holy than a seat at the table
.....so they are uninvited
....more like....appointed...chosen, positioned...
NOOOOOO!!!!
They are martyrs, an offering for the Bride
Jesus, too, offered up, the souls of the sacred,
....freedom isn't free!
..........LOVE costs more dearly than anything in this life or the life to come
We are going to a celebration,
That The Sacred Ones paid for...in blood.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-12-2018
Note: Let us be sober-minded, most especially, reverent about LOVE. Daddy God gave His all...His one and only son. Those who are "Sacred Ones," give up their lives freely, because they KNOW LOVE, and hold HIM in a HOLY PLACE that is immovable.
With the essence of purity
White as transparent as a ray
of Eternal Light
Every movement reveals
Facets of His great LOVE
Every sound vibrates
the floating souls
Present and accounted
......as.....
~The Sacred Ones~
No one speaks
No one moves
As they are gathered
In a place
............ONLY DADDY GOD can go....
Who are they
Why does their place seem...off limits
More holy than a seat at the table
.....so they are uninvited
....more like....appointed...chosen, positioned...
NOOOOOO!!!!
They are martyrs, an offering for the Bride
Jesus, too, offered up, the souls of the sacred,
....freedom isn't free!
..........LOVE costs more dearly than anything in this life or the life to come
We are going to a celebration,
That The Sacred Ones paid for...in blood.
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-12-2018
Note: Let us be sober-minded, most especially, reverent about LOVE. Daddy God gave His all...His one and only son. Those who are "Sacred Ones," give up their lives freely, because they KNOW LOVE, and hold HIM in a HOLY PLACE that is immovable.
Saturday, June 9, 2018
ZION'S CHILDREN
You came to me in the night
Perceiving my heart's desire
My candle for you, still lit
But no roaring fire
...monotony...
You speak, I listen
You command, I yield
"Can't you see, I'm barren
There's no fruit in my field!"
...UGH...
Promises made to me
Witnesses present to attest
Your LOVE is grand
But I can't rest
...with LACK.....GIVE IT BACK...
....take, took, taken
....all my goods, gathered
.....and bakin'
.........................IN the OVENS of ENTITLED WOMEN.........
.....ccccccccccccRRRRRRRRRRaaaaaaa
c
K
"My LOVE, did you hear?
There is no heart to embrace
Shattered sea glass lies
On the bed of your grace
.....I have nothing left to give...."
Looking back at that time
Never, not once...did I see
All you gave up for self
In order to be near...ME!?!
....but, I didn't choose YOU...
Like "The Giving Tree"
You gave me your all, and I took
Til barrenness lined your fields
And I just never wanted to look
....to know
.........my humanity
.........in light of your LOVE
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-09-2018
Monday, June 4, 2018
VICTORY VIGIL
He paces the floor
Waiting for a word
But the silence is deafening
Only his anxiety being heard
What is to come
What will be of this world
Who in their right mind
Would have a warrior be a girl
....a man...it's gotta be a man...
False prophets speak of events
Circumstance come and go with the wind
No one is speaking of hope
Just everything coming to a fiery end
Wait a minute...
I'm sure His book says...contradiction
Who can make sense out of
Blathering prophecy disguised as prediction
....women are the problem....yes...indeed
Men are straight forward
Without manipulation and bending to fit
Men don't argue and moan
They take what they get
We were doing fine
Til women were given a voice
No one wants to hear about
The right of men to have "secret" choice
....stupid ignorance...just shUT UP ALREADY!!!
The countdown has begun...3...2...WON!!!!
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-04-2018
Waiting for a word
But the silence is deafening
Only his anxiety being heard
What is to come
What will be of this world
Who in their right mind
Would have a warrior be a girl
....a man...it's gotta be a man...
False prophets speak of events
Circumstance come and go with the wind
No one is speaking of hope
Just everything coming to a fiery end
Wait a minute...
I'm sure His book says...contradiction
Who can make sense out of
Blathering prophecy disguised as prediction
....women are the problem....yes...indeed
Men are straight forward
Without manipulation and bending to fit
Men don't argue and moan
They take what they get
We were doing fine
Til women were given a voice
No one wants to hear about
The right of men to have "secret" choice
....stupid ignorance...just shUT UP ALREADY!!!
The countdown has begun...3...2...WON!!!!
Written by Trudy Schrader on 06-04-2018
Thursday, May 24, 2018
THE POWER OF PETITION
In the beginning, the couple was united
Flowing with no regard to decision
The fluid motion of word and deed
Created living without division
~then came the split~
When he laid eyes upon her beauty
A deep fire stirred within his soul
A yearning that compelled him to reach
And unite, but never again, be whole
~something different, yet familiar~
Enthralled with each others form
They explored and played with innocent wonder
Discovering preference and choice
Til assumption made a very rude blunder
~he leads, she follows~
Never before had direction and order
Been discussed between the unified two
The separation had brought to light
There is choice in everything you say and do
~personal responsibility~
He knew the order, she wanted choice
Feeling powerless without a say
He walked with the Creator
And she was supposed to follow His way
~no one asked~
The exploration of need is unnecessary
A walk in the park to play
Everything essential to living, provided
Given without a choice or intention to go a different way
~except THAT tree~
The lure of forbidden drew her near
As want flamed anew in their heart
No reference of death had ever been
Nor creator and creation ever apart
~soooo, maybe, yes~
With difference present among same
And forbidden constantly there
The pull of promise and something new
Brought the united to share
~in lack~
She watched in horror as man gave an account
Blaming God for giving him a flawed creation
She ratted out the beguiling serpant
For daring to give her a desirable invitation
~to experience free will~
Humanity has come full circle
With 7,000 years to hear the woman's heart cry
It is rude to use power and position
To decide without an inclination to vie
~for passion~
Women united say, "Fight for me"
Value and worth are conveyed in a question
What would you like to happen
Let us be united in our flow's direction
~in love~
Written by Trudy Schrader on 05-24-2018
Note: I pray that you can see the power of petition. When we ask for what we desire, it is honoring and respectful to the person from whom we want to receive. Assumption is a marriage killer, and it takes many forms, the worst being emotional abuse. There are women who are in marriages where there is no desire to be known, just shown how to act, think, behave, believe, etc. YUCK!
Flowing with no regard to decision
The fluid motion of word and deed
Created living without division
~then came the split~
When he laid eyes upon her beauty
A deep fire stirred within his soul
A yearning that compelled him to reach
And unite, but never again, be whole
~something different, yet familiar~
Enthralled with each others form
They explored and played with innocent wonder
Discovering preference and choice
Til assumption made a very rude blunder
~he leads, she follows~
Never before had direction and order
Been discussed between the unified two
The separation had brought to light
There is choice in everything you say and do
~personal responsibility~
He knew the order, she wanted choice
Feeling powerless without a say
He walked with the Creator
And she was supposed to follow His way
~no one asked~
The exploration of need is unnecessary
A walk in the park to play
Everything essential to living, provided
Given without a choice or intention to go a different way
~except THAT tree~
The lure of forbidden drew her near
As want flamed anew in their heart
No reference of death had ever been
Nor creator and creation ever apart
~soooo, maybe, yes~
With difference present among same
And forbidden constantly there
The pull of promise and something new
Brought the united to share
~in lack~
She watched in horror as man gave an account
Blaming God for giving him a flawed creation
She ratted out the beguiling serpant
For daring to give her a desirable invitation
~to experience free will~
Humanity has come full circle
With 7,000 years to hear the woman's heart cry
It is rude to use power and position
To decide without an inclination to vie
~for passion~
Women united say, "Fight for me"
Value and worth are conveyed in a question
What would you like to happen
Let us be united in our flow's direction
~in love~
Written by Trudy Schrader on 05-24-2018
Note: I pray that you can see the power of petition. When we ask for what we desire, it is honoring and respectful to the person from whom we want to receive. Assumption is a marriage killer, and it takes many forms, the worst being emotional abuse. There are women who are in marriages where there is no desire to be known, just shown how to act, think, behave, believe, etc. YUCK!
Sunday, May 20, 2018
THE CHOSEN ONE
Fear has a way of multiplying
Like the hidden abode of a cancer cell
So what would LOVE do
With the thwarted ones who fell
~into PRIDE~
The second heaven became their home
As they grew and gained glory
Certain they could conquer LOVE
With the rightly timed victorious story
~seeped in lies~
Crafty, cunning, hissing, having
Everything desire grabbed to take
Creating with inflamed imaginations
A burning, bubbling, lusty lake
~of fake finds~
Man drowning in their own passions
Giving into destructive behaviors and words
No longer could the joy of creation
By viewed or clearly heard
....so twisted...gnarled....entwined
Before the foundation of earth was laid
The Chosen One was slain
...on a tree
.....where fear spoke to free
.............humanity from its CREATOR
No need to tell the story
LOVE wins ALL the glory
By laying on tree of choice
And paying the FULL price for difference to have a voice
...with Daddy God
Written by Trudy Schrader on 05-20-2018
Note: Most believers have some notion that Jesus made his sacrifice for SOME of His "special" children. He paid for every DIFFERENCE choice could make; otherwise, fear wins...meaning, some sins could prevent children from getting in to talk with Daddy God. Not possible. Daddy God loves ALL of His children :)
Like the hidden abode of a cancer cell
So what would LOVE do
With the thwarted ones who fell
~into PRIDE~
The second heaven became their home
As they grew and gained glory
Certain they could conquer LOVE
With the rightly timed victorious story
~seeped in lies~
Crafty, cunning, hissing, having
Everything desire grabbed to take
Creating with inflamed imaginations
A burning, bubbling, lusty lake
~of fake finds~
Man drowning in their own passions
Giving into destructive behaviors and words
No longer could the joy of creation
By viewed or clearly heard
....so twisted...gnarled....entwined
Before the foundation of earth was laid
The Chosen One was slain
...on a tree
.....where fear spoke to free
.............humanity from its CREATOR
No need to tell the story
LOVE wins ALL the glory
By laying on tree of choice
And paying the FULL price for difference to have a voice
...with Daddy God
Written by Trudy Schrader on 05-20-2018
Note: Most believers have some notion that Jesus made his sacrifice for SOME of His "special" children. He paid for every DIFFERENCE choice could make; otherwise, fear wins...meaning, some sins could prevent children from getting in to talk with Daddy God. Not possible. Daddy God loves ALL of His children :)
Wednesday, May 16, 2018
THE EXALTED ONE
The flood waters had drawn back
Land made its debut
The past gone and over
With nothing but hope in view
Hard work and labor ahead
Building and creating...what
Grown minds can't forget experience
No matter how one sought
...to begin again
After a time of planting and pruning
Harvest came in fullness of glory
Lending God's blessing
To the legendary story
Funny how a flood can wash away life
But not bring one to self control
The father "god" released himself
To the lusts of his consuming soul
...in celebration of humanity
What did Cush know before
That seeped under the skin to once again
Reveal the nakedness of humanity
And the sepulcher of sin
Had LOVE been present with Noah
His response could not have been a curse
Forgiveness and compassion
Would have covered even the worst
....desires
He walked away with a fear of self
And exalted himself in fear and shame
He would never need that presence again
When he forged a powerful, worship base...of a name
He would create a world of debauchary
Where twisted passions are indulged
Men and women could experiment
And the nakedness of man bulged
...in plain sight
Kingdoms came and went throughout the ages
Merging and assimilating with one
Osiris and Isis, pagan gods
Yet "freedom" displays their symbols under GOD and GUN
All of civilization has been touched by failure
To respond appropriately to fear
Written history slants truth to serve agendas
With peanuts and beer
...with a wink of the eye
The system hides at the height of education
The breaking down of a flowing mind
Add a little "god" to the knowledge
And one can operate outside of the confines of time
Raising humanity above the sludge of soul
Into the heavenlies of a magical god
Using the terrors and horrors of the past
To make a paved road, much easier to trod
...to the ALL SEEING EYE
Education under the guise of religion
Is the perfect place to hide humanity's fear
We wonder if there is a difference, choice can make
That will bring down an all-consuming fire to sear
Man's conscience to perfection, the sainted election
Of those who will go into the next world, without sin
How can GOD deliver humanity, anew
Without ONE failing again...and again
...nothing new under the sun
Written by Trudy Schrader on 05-16-2018
Land made its debut
The past gone and over
With nothing but hope in view
Hard work and labor ahead
Building and creating...what
Grown minds can't forget experience
No matter how one sought
...to begin again
After a time of planting and pruning
Harvest came in fullness of glory
Lending God's blessing
To the legendary story
Funny how a flood can wash away life
But not bring one to self control
The father "god" released himself
To the lusts of his consuming soul
...in celebration of humanity
What did Cush know before
That seeped under the skin to once again
Reveal the nakedness of humanity
And the sepulcher of sin
Had LOVE been present with Noah
His response could not have been a curse
Forgiveness and compassion
Would have covered even the worst
....desires
He walked away with a fear of self
And exalted himself in fear and shame
He would never need that presence again
When he forged a powerful, worship base...of a name
He would create a world of debauchary
Where twisted passions are indulged
Men and women could experiment
And the nakedness of man bulged
...in plain sight
Kingdoms came and went throughout the ages
Merging and assimilating with one
Osiris and Isis, pagan gods
Yet "freedom" displays their symbols under GOD and GUN
All of civilization has been touched by failure
To respond appropriately to fear
Written history slants truth to serve agendas
With peanuts and beer
...with a wink of the eye
The system hides at the height of education
The breaking down of a flowing mind
Add a little "god" to the knowledge
And one can operate outside of the confines of time
Raising humanity above the sludge of soul
Into the heavenlies of a magical god
Using the terrors and horrors of the past
To make a paved road, much easier to trod
...to the ALL SEEING EYE
Education under the guise of religion
Is the perfect place to hide humanity's fear
We wonder if there is a difference, choice can make
That will bring down an all-consuming fire to sear
Man's conscience to perfection, the sainted election
Of those who will go into the next world, without sin
How can GOD deliver humanity, anew
Without ONE failing again...and again
...nothing new under the sun
Written by Trudy Schrader on 05-16-2018
Tuesday, May 15, 2018
THE HIDDEN ONE
Born, alone and rejected
In a place of poverty and want
She was nothing to look at
Pallor, puny and gaunt
Whatever sickness was within
Experience made it worse
She was Wednesday's child
Born under a curse
The suffering of her youth
Left her sarcastic and crude
But a wonderful sense of humor
Covered her nude
~appearance~
When did the miracles begin
Transformation always a part
She could never stay fixed
With LOVE leading her heart
Angry and disgusted with living
She cried out to die, in vain
Since death never came to her
She believed suffering was her name
All of her efforts focused on self
Trying to be a success
No matter how much she tried
A visible stain was on her dress
One day, LOVE delivered her
And took her into the deep silence
Where sound could test
The soul's alliance
~LOVE~
Tested in every way, this way and that
Who is your GOD, life demanded
When you are judged
To whom will you be remanded
She retreated into her wooden closet
Full of memories and meaning
She began lifting them up to the light
To see where her heart had been leaning
~self...SORROW...suffering~
As LOVE lifted her up, and she saw
Light flowing in fullness of color
Rhythm and vibration
Began to reveal...her mother
"My mother is RESTORATION", she exclaimed
As she yielded to her touch of calming comfort
Like aloe vera removing the heat
Where living had left the skin sunburnt
Focus changed from self, to giving out
All the blessing being poured in
Others saw her as wasted and ruined
Where her self-serving idol had once been
Names, positions, fame, and riches
Passed by without a wayward glance
She had vision and purpose
Without a hope to advance
~in the system~
In her bed, while others slept
She left her body to rest
Running with LOVE into dark places
Where fear rushed to invest
Fighting in unison with her LOVE
To win the war against the perception of lack
Love guided her in every step
To claim territory fear had to give back
The war was won before the creation of time
Fear is gone, and LOVE is divine
When lightening strikes
And the tree falls in the yard
The hidden one will leave
Be on your guard
Guard your heart above all things
Let not religious sayings pass through your mouth
Be LOVE in word and in deed
A servant to all is what life is about
The war is won; be of good courage
Written by Trudy Schrader on 05-15-2018
In a place of poverty and want
She was nothing to look at
Pallor, puny and gaunt
Whatever sickness was within
Experience made it worse
She was Wednesday's child
Born under a curse
The suffering of her youth
Left her sarcastic and crude
But a wonderful sense of humor
Covered her nude
~appearance~
When did the miracles begin
Transformation always a part
She could never stay fixed
With LOVE leading her heart
Angry and disgusted with living
She cried out to die, in vain
Since death never came to her
She believed suffering was her name
All of her efforts focused on self
Trying to be a success
No matter how much she tried
A visible stain was on her dress
One day, LOVE delivered her
And took her into the deep silence
Where sound could test
The soul's alliance
~LOVE~
Tested in every way, this way and that
Who is your GOD, life demanded
When you are judged
To whom will you be remanded
She retreated into her wooden closet
Full of memories and meaning
She began lifting them up to the light
To see where her heart had been leaning
~self...SORROW...suffering~
As LOVE lifted her up, and she saw
Light flowing in fullness of color
Rhythm and vibration
Began to reveal...her mother
"My mother is RESTORATION", she exclaimed
As she yielded to her touch of calming comfort
Like aloe vera removing the heat
Where living had left the skin sunburnt
Focus changed from self, to giving out
All the blessing being poured in
Others saw her as wasted and ruined
Where her self-serving idol had once been
Names, positions, fame, and riches
Passed by without a wayward glance
She had vision and purpose
Without a hope to advance
~in the system~
In her bed, while others slept
She left her body to rest
Running with LOVE into dark places
Where fear rushed to invest
Fighting in unison with her LOVE
To win the war against the perception of lack
Love guided her in every step
To claim territory fear had to give back
The war was won before the creation of time
Fear is gone, and LOVE is divine
When lightening strikes
And the tree falls in the yard
The hidden one will leave
Be on your guard
Guard your heart above all things
Let not religious sayings pass through your mouth
Be LOVE in word and in deed
A servant to all is what life is about
The war is won; be of good courage
Written by Trudy Schrader on 05-15-2018
Monday, May 14, 2018
THE UNOPENED GIFT
He walked upon her in the woods
Lying there, with placenta and blood on her skin
He didn't question where she was going
But knew where she had been
~unwanted, unloved, unnoticed~
He cleaned her carefully
Removed the dead weight and stains of sorrow and grief
He dressed her in royal gowns
Daily changing her value and belief
~desired, delightful, distinct~
When she was grown and ready for love
He gave her a precious stones to wear
Her adornment was a testament
To LOVE's extravagant concern and care
~powerful transformation~
She began to walk among the people
Whispered gashes flew through the air
Words tore her garments
And left her naked to the judgmental stares
~unworthy, undeserving, undone~
He watched from His window
And saw HIS LOVE packaged in an unopened box
Sworn off as a harlot with no lineage
They began to pick up rocks
~thrown away, thwarted, taken down....
down, down, to the very ground
she came up from
What can LOVE do now
When siblings break their own
Rejection is endurable
But family fault finding leaves the redeemed, in the silent alone
of the abyss
what courage can bring
LOVE out of this
She walked away, into the great unknown
With the garment of humility around her waist
Her head bowed low, and gait amiss
With all she'd encountered and faced
~with LOVE~
Seasons passed as she drudged through the days
Looking for LOVE to find her again
She had come to the line of despair
And almost gave in to the lies she discovered there
~abandoned, average,aloof~
LOVE showed up and caught her next breath
Giving back what she believed to be gone
He said, "You are the UNOPENED GIFT
My LOVE has chosen to ride upon
~given, golden, glad~
Rejoicing in the moment, HE took her away
To a City made of gold and jewels
A place where difference is accepted
And creativity with LOVE, rules
Written by Trudy Schrader on 04-16-2018
Note: So many gifts Daddy God gives us, that remain unopened, because we fail to value LOVE.
Lying there, with placenta and blood on her skin
He didn't question where she was going
But knew where she had been
~unwanted, unloved, unnoticed~
He cleaned her carefully
Removed the dead weight and stains of sorrow and grief
He dressed her in royal gowns
Daily changing her value and belief
~desired, delightful, distinct~
When she was grown and ready for love
He gave her a precious stones to wear
Her adornment was a testament
To LOVE's extravagant concern and care
~powerful transformation~
She began to walk among the people
Whispered gashes flew through the air
Words tore her garments
And left her naked to the judgmental stares
~unworthy, undeserving, undone~
He watched from His window
And saw HIS LOVE packaged in an unopened box
Sworn off as a harlot with no lineage
They began to pick up rocks
~thrown away, thwarted, taken down....
down, down, to the very ground
she came up from
What can LOVE do now
When siblings break their own
Rejection is endurable
But family fault finding leaves the redeemed, in the silent alone
of the abyss
what courage can bring
LOVE out of this
She walked away, into the great unknown
With the garment of humility around her waist
Her head bowed low, and gait amiss
With all she'd encountered and faced
~with LOVE~
Seasons passed as she drudged through the days
Looking for LOVE to find her again
She had come to the line of despair
And almost gave in to the lies she discovered there
~abandoned, average,aloof~
LOVE showed up and caught her next breath
Giving back what she believed to be gone
He said, "You are the UNOPENED GIFT
My LOVE has chosen to ride upon
~given, golden, glad~
Rejoicing in the moment, HE took her away
To a City made of gold and jewels
A place where difference is accepted
And creativity with LOVE, rules
Written by Trudy Schrader on 04-16-2018
Note: So many gifts Daddy God gives us, that remain unopened, because we fail to value LOVE.
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